transforming grace

I'm pretty sure that many of you have read Transforming Grace by Jerry Bridges at some point. Last night, Tina and I decided to read it together. If you would like to read (and in some cases reread) it alongside us, let us know.

Priorities, priorities

note: Grace is in the batter's box today! Please pray for her and encourage her.


Ben - get all of work done during the week so that Sunday can be his Q-day
SY - has been keeping the Sabbath. Want to be more intentional about praying though: so twice a month will spend 1 hour praying, more specifically.
Dave Lee - wake up early for QTs.
Sungho - fasting Fridays.
Donna - As soon as get home from work - read the Bible. Before getting too tired.
Chchung - Spend more time in prayer during QTs. Wants to pray for people who aren't saved. Also more prayer for the church.
Mike - Doesn't workout consistently anymore; and this reflects spiritual discipline. So wants to lead a more disciplined life in general.
Grace Cho - Q-Day to listen to Stott's sermon. Off on Monday so will do it. Won't knit, plan, etc.
Jason Park - Wants to hear what God has to say. So will pause to listen to God. Have a listening posture.
Christina - Q nights. Instead of worrying will try to pray more.
Joe Kwalk - Wants to be consistent everyday w/ spiritual disciplines. (B/c not at GNC, feels disconnected and detached).
Dave Choi - discipline. Consistency in QT. No structure for QT.
Carms - Wake up earlier. Have some Q time 30 min before work starts in my office for prayer.
Tina - keep my QT time more structured and regular (instead of switching times / randomly opening any passage)

Thanks guys

Hi everyone,

I had the fear of Sungho maybe asking how I'm doing in front of everyone and he did. Oh well. hahaha. But I didn't really get to thank those who's been praying for me, and those who listened as I shared. So I just wanted to say thank you...
Please don't think I'm depressed all the time, because things are really good a lot of the times. hahaha. I just really tend to go up and down, from extreme to extreme... and it can even happen in one day. When things are going down the hill, I tend to get really disappointed at myself. Even when things are good, I get disappointed at myself for not being better. I keep repeating to myself that I'm not good enough - not a good enough friend, not being able to put my heart into things enough, wasting enough time... The thing is, I know that even though I excelled just ever so slightly or significantly in those areas, I would still feel like I'm not good enough. A lot of the lies that I've been dwelling on - I know they're not true. God tells me so, and His grace speaks out for me. It doesn't matter what I do and how well I think I do it. It shouldn't matter what other people think. But I keep on going back to that place over and over again, and I'm sick and tired of finding myself at that place... A friend told me to just cross that line of lies and never step back to it, just a couple days ago. And there, I found myself again, the very morning of yesterday...

But at yesterday's meeting, I was really reminded that there are people who are striving to reach for the same place - where Jesus calls us to come and find peace in Him. And I thank God for allowing me to come to that place from time to time even in the midst of struggles. Even though I feel like giving up, not do anything and just wait for God's timing, I was reminded that He is the King I'm living for, and there are steps that I can take to strive for a relationship with the one and only, "best" God in the world. So again, I thank everyone..and I thank you, Jesus.

This is a verse I've been repeating to myself since a few days ago, from Isaiah 55:8-9:

8 "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

9 "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

...To keep eyes off of myself and know to dwell on His very Word, power and strength, that is sure and true :]

seeking respite

over the past 6 months, i had become complacent in my spiritual walk and it became evident in my lifestyle. after a rough day of working and interacting with people, i either sought the comfort of donna at the time, or friends that i could confide in, or open a bottle of wine and sift through the shows playing on tv. i was seeking rest in the wrong areas/places and as a result, my spirit became weak. i was no longer walking in Christ, and left myself exposed to the sins of this world. one day i realized, my life was no different than those of non-christians.
that was my life until i heard the john stott seminar. he spoke of his monthly routine to dedicate a day to soley spend time with God. he would spend his time soaking in nature, reflecting on His creation, reading the Word, and praying. as it is stated in Matthew 11:25, he put into practice laying his burdens on Christs' yoke. he then challenged us to do the same.
on the heels of listening to the john stott's seminar, donna and i actually took a day off to spend some quiet time with God. not surprisingly, my spirit felt stronger and i felt good to be a christian once again. no longer did i feel the burden of having to work the next day, or be afraid of rubbing shoulders with people who do not share in the same beliefs as christians. instead, i was looking forward to the next day. now, i know it may only be a matter of time before my spiritual high goes away, which is why i think it is important to repeat this practice.

i've been sharing this with sung ho in the last couple of weeks and he asked to me to post this on our blog. in addition to briefly sharing my struggles, i also thought it would be a great idea for the small group leaders to spend one saturday together as a group for a quiet time. what do you guys think?

Prayer Meeting for N Jersey

We had our first small group prayer meeting this past Friday. We have prayer time during small groups from time to time, but we devoted the entire time to prayer. It was a small group of 6 of us. I had everyone write down 1-2 prayer requests for themselves, for SG/church, and for the world. Diana brought Hyun's guitar and John played it. John, Mike, Stretch and I usually come directly from work and take the train to Glen Rock together. We ate, sang a couple of songs, shared and prayed.

I felt like our prayer time was genuine to where we are right now. For a lot of us, it had been a long time since we had engaged in more than 1-2 hours in corporate prayer. It was a tad bit awkward but in a cute "getting to know you" kind of way. We struggled with the words of a song John picked because some of us didn't know the words... we didn't exactly know how we wanted to structure the time. And we didn't even get to the third topic because it took us nearly 2 hours to cover the first two. We chuckled a little bit at funny remarks and added commentary and asked questions when we wanted to probe a little bit. I really appreciated people's honesty and their desire for this time of prayer to become a truly blessing time.

It's funny how as we started praying, I thought of a million other things we could pray for, and it was great to be praying side by side with brothers and sisters... and to be prayed for. I loved it ;)

We have small group tomorrow, and I want to suggest that we meet 1x a month since small group meets for bible study 2x a month. The limiting factor is me - I travel about 50% (and I host), but I hope it works out. Please pray for us as we conclude the praying book. Because I'll be in California, Toronto, then home for a day before flying to Korea on a 2 week vacation, we'll have a 3 week break. I just hope we don't lose momentum....

(What did we eat?: Chicken Teriyaki from the Japanese place at Garden State Plaza)

I want to share some pictures of our small group too! This is the latest picture we took at Sang's birthday dinner. Taken after we sang an embarrassingly out of tune "Happy Birthday" song to Sang.

Woodbridge SG is back!

we're really excited. ha. actually, it's been a long time since we got together, and i've heard different members express to me how they've been looking forward to the group getting back together. with the addition of caroline, and timothy the baby, we're really starting to grow.

this thursday will be our first meeting since before the summer. please pray that people would come with a willingness to be open and to share...and a hunger for community. i also haven't seen aaron for awhile, and am looking forward to seeing him come to sg. he's been very vocal about wanting to form a community, and was a little sad when we decided to break for the summer.

we're going to keep in casual - a snack potluck, praise, sharing and prayer. we're also going to be deciding which book to cover this year. we're currently choosing between tim keller's two most recent books - the reason for God and the prodigal God. katerina's english has really improved and i see her as really standing to benefit from this year's discussions.

it'll also be interesting to see the dynamic with a baby in our midst! i'm sure it'll provide a new set of joys as well as challenges, but pray that we'd all be able to roll with the new situation and be gracious in a new set of circumstances. i'm excited for the new small group year, but i also want to remember to give God the reins and the glory over all the joys and trials that will come our way this year.

this week

i thought ben did a good job leading this week. we decided to take turns leading but still contribute to the group conversation. sam lee had more questions than usual, which was a good thing for discussion. we also got into pairs and shared/prayed for one another. my hope is that the small group can be an extension of one of the aspects of the local church, in terms of accountability/discipline. it's somewhat easy to share vaguely without getting too personal. but i think that we can foster an environment to be vulnerable and deeper. i like the analogy that sam got from someone that church should be like a hospital for the sick. if we are scared to share our symptoms, then we'll only get worse. also, not to be cynical, but i feel like small group is almost preaching to the choir. the ones who consistently come out are the ones who are already pretty committed.